Just when you thought scorpions were only for the desert, here’s an interesting tidbit to wet your whistle about the little, clawed warlocks. If old, dusty books just don’t do it for you, no worries, because these creatures aren’t complaining. I guess there really is someone for everyone after all…

The pseudoscorpion, an artist formerly known as Sir Pinch-A-Lot (oh yeah – I just went there), is a teeny-tiny arachnid that is only about 4mm in length. Unable to harm humans – due to its size and our being masters of the universe – it does do some serious damage to booklice and dust mites. Their fondness for books can only be explained by a sophistication that far surpasses your average insect. My respect for the ant hill has plummeted!

So, log on to your amazon.com account and cancel your order for Old Book Protectant. Then, head on down to your local Scorpion Huddle House for a couple of these buggers. You’ll be the most popular kid on the playground with your collection of shiny old books and scholarly insects doing readings with spectacles and British accents. Know more.