In mid-August, the State of Missouri began gearing up to celebrate the upcoming 225th anniversary of the First Amendment of the Bill of Rights, which was submitted to the states for approval in late September of 1789. The Amendment which guarantees U.S. citizens shall have, among other things, freedom of speech, the right to assemble, and freedom of the press seemed to be on the minds of the police force in Ferguson, Missouri after their blatant violation of citizen Mike Brown’s right to “life”.

After careful consideration, the unit decided that the throngs of angry crowds gathering the St. Louis suburb in protest of Brown’s death were a perfect chance to celebrate American freedom by providing free tear gas displays for all local residents. Local school children were even given the chance to fall choking to the ground as police tossed canisters freely into crowds including them and their horrified parents. Local resident Candice Dotson had this to say after she and her young son were swept up in one such display, “It was horrible. There were little bitty kids in strollers. He’s okay, but he’s scared out of his mind.”

A few lucky residents were even given the opportunity to be sprayed with rubber bullets when police deemed their reactions to the tear gas not quite enthusiastic enough. One such gentleman shared his experience, saying “These motherfuckers came out of the cut and sprayed me in the face like this is a fucking video game or something.”

Police chief Tom Jackson told ABC news that some residents were even participating in the fun by brandishing the effects of a country wide trend promoting increasingly dangerous street weapons such as rocks and Molotov cocktails. Reports confirm that both of these increasingly dangerous weapons have indeed been on the rise since the decline in popularity of both the pebble and the slingshot around the turn of the first millennium. Know more.