Chuck norris fact iraq

Maybe he’s a secret Mexican, who invaded the USA a long time ago, or maybe Chuck Norris doesn’t need a reason to change his name. He is the reason.

The man (who likes his meat so rare he only eats unicorns) was actually born Carlos Ray Norris in 1940. Since his birth, the theory of evolution has been disproven because now there is only a list of animals that Chuck Norris allows to live. No more. No less.

He wasn’t actually known as “Chuck”, a nickname at first, until he signed up for the US Air Force at the ripe age of 18 years. It turns out the Air Force had nothing to teach him, but he did teach the military his special brand of martial arts and filmmaking in the style of cheesy 80s action films way before cheesy 80s action films were in style (this was in the late 50s and early 60s). The military classified the cheesy 80s action technology because Chuck recommended that the public was not ready to receive it.

It was with this advanced fighting technology that the US military invaded Vietnam.

The military finally released the technology to the public in the 80s because Chuck Norris said to. Chuck wanted to capitalize on it by selling it to Hollywood, so he set up in California as a consultant to movie producers.

But Hollywood is run by fools. They couldn’t understand his genius. He might as well have been speaking in Mandarin with a Texas accent, so he fired everyone behind the camera and all the leading men in his movies. He wrote his movies. He directed his movies. He even took the initiative to star in his movies because who could possibly command the silver screen with more grace than him? Not those fools in Hollywood. Only Chuck.

Now, you know the true story of Chuck Norris. Know more.